18 July 2012

THE PRISONER OF AIR INDIA!!


           WARNING: PRAY BEFORE YOU READ:- "OH GOD..PLEASE NEVER TEST MY PATIENCE WITH THE BELOW MENTIONED EXPERIENCE EVER!!!"                                                    

                                                                                                         “The world is a book and those who do not travel read only one page.” 

                                                                                                                                                              ― Augustine of Hippo

This post is to express my disgust with the horrific service of Air India. I know Air India has always been a problem creator for everyone but still people choose to travel in Air India! Why? The answer for this question can be categorized among the ones which fall in the list of no-answer-for-it. All Air India fans or passengers must read this!!!!!

As someone said somewhere… NO PAIN….NO STORIES! I get to write these posts only through my experiences and the horrible incidents I went through.

                                 Since my classes for the 2nd year was starting on 14th june….i had to be there in college on time since attendance played a vital role in our grades. I just dint want to miss any attendance….! So all I did was……(as usual) make out a plan:
(a) Leave Jeddah on 13th
(b) Flight is at 10:00 pm (Jeddah time)
(c) Reach India at around 6 am (Indian time)
(d) Take luggage and leave for college directly
(e) Reach college by 8.30 am
(f) Class starts at 9 am!
(g) No missing of attendance!
              Perfect!!! What a plan!!! I'm proud of my plans….(until its not a flop). After departing from my wonderfull family I was directed to get into the flight. As usual I had my window seat for which I was never ready to compromise. The flight attendant was a handsome hunk (yeah…he was) who directed me to my seat. The two seats next to me were vacant. All I did was pray to god that no horrible man come and sit with me like last time who killed me to that extend talking that I had to pretend that I was sleeping.

This time my prayer was not heard again….and 2 uncles came and sat next to me due to which I changed my place and sat with a lady and her 4 year old son. This marked the beginning of my most memorable journey!

I was never gobsmacked by such an experience in my entire life traveling in flight. It was around 10.30 pm when we got into the flight. They showed all their safety videos on what to do in case the plane crash into the red sea! I was totally fed up of this video! We waited till 11.The flight dint take off.
People slowly started getting up and have a good walk on the aisle. A man sitting right in front of me kept cracking stupid dialogues on how many times he have been on a plane. I got totally pissed. As if I'm travelling for the first time! The 4 year old boy sitting next to me kept telling me tales of everything under the sun which he knows till now. My mom kept calling me to know if the plane took off. But every time my answer was a no! It became 12. And before taking off……they served the food!  In order to entertain us they put on the film ‘bodyguard’!! And then it happened…..!!!!


The current went off!!! Yeah….there was no electricity inside the flight!! People became aggressive; they went near the main door and started banking on it! The flight attendants got pissed! We could do nothing. Some men next to me started telling about having trust!! And some said, our flight is just like our country, no current! Sum one from behind shouted, “We must take this picture and post in facebook! Ha-ha!! We r all suffering here and he’s thinking of facebook???! Ugh!! How wonderfully irritating!

The time kept running as if this was its last chance to win the Olympics medal! It became 2…!! Still no change in our pathetic condition.
Plan (a)-SUCCESS!!
Plan (b)-FLOP!!
Plan (c)-FLOP!!
Plan (d), (e), (f) and (g) --- BIGGEST FLOPZ!!!!
ME AND MY EVER STUPID PLANS!!
 I assured myself that I won’t reach college even in the evening! The passengers did take pictures from different corners in different angles! Slowly I started hearing really typical abuses from people. I knew that their saturation level was totally over…. It was 4 hours that we were sitting in the flight with no current! It started getting really hot in the plane. And not even an ac!it was getting suffocating more! Some sat explaining y they took air India.thr was just ac in the washroom and I think 2-3 people got into it for cooling themselves. Sum men shouted off just like fishermen call out when they get good harvest. Ha-ha. I still dint want to laugh! a man from behind called an airhostess ancestral object. Yeah …I cant blame them….She was really old. Just like a grandma having 176 grandchildren still want to look young, so she slapped a ton of make up on her face!!! She was not able to even walk properly and kept shooting English words at these typical passengers (who obviously understood nothing!!)!! I still don’t get why Air India recruits oldies instead of giving them pension!


We all had become like a family already! A family of sitting people in the dark! A kerosene kind of smell was coming from the hot-air-providing Ac's. And trust me I dint want to guess anything from it! The small boy next to me dint sleep also!! He kept playing on the lights and poke me….the light right above my head went on-off-on-0ff!! And his mom shamelessly enjoyed her son’s game at this point of night instead of asking him not to disturb me!! All I could do was smile at them! I heard the air hostess yelling at the people 4 banking the door! Sum crazy man shouted from behind lets sing songs! And m like what? 


I checked the time….it was already time that v reached there! Finally one man came running and gave us a big information ''the first class passengers had ac on!''. So this is why people prefer first class. Even in the worst condition money can buy some relief! Just one more hour and we would have reached India! But here we are still sucked in a plane! 


And finally lights came! Hurray! A ray of hope and happiness filled my heart! Finally we were going to fly. We were asked to sit back in the seats. And I saw a happy face n every1. But then a man said the electricity was only from the generator and booom! Again went the current. 

AAAAAAAAArrrrrrrrGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!! And I heard a roar f aggression from all the passengers. It was iritatng.evry1 started grabbing stuffs from the kitchen. A man had kept a muslim marriage song in full volume which ate my head. Sum1 threw a pack of nuts at me 2 (which they got from the so called kitchen). Everyone started distributing it to everyone and I was like…..is it a flight??? Or some market?  The bossy man n front f me was teaching his friends how to eat nuts. As if they don’t know. Then the air hostess started giving the nuts got it again! 2 in all. I kept both the packs in front f me and just stared at it! Ugh! I wanted to shout at that man to stop that stupid old Hindi songs which he was playing beside me. Uh!
 Finally lights came back at 3.00 am!!! My migraine was at its peaks.

 No1 wanted movies or any hell anymore! We all just and just wanted to fly off! but for my worst nightmare and the ever most unfortunateness, they started showing the stupid safety precautions video over again! My head was burning as a whole. Not just the front part. But the whole brain! They kept showing their 1889 made old safety videos! Ugh! I saw the belt sign lighted and wore my belt ASAP like a kg kid packing bag on hearing the last bell!! And the other passengers  gave me a stupid gal look. The bossy man still dint give rest to his mouth…..the small boy was still playing with the lights above my head….the old uncle still dint off his 12th century songs….. And finally the plane took off at 3.08 am (jeddah time)!! Only god and the passengers in it knew how we finally reached India! I sat laughing thinking about the day when others gave me a what-the-hell look! I reached college by 4.00 pm (Indian time) which according to my plan was 9.00 am in the morning!


5 hours waiting in the flight and 5 hours travel in the flight….! All my plans went in drain….Many canceled their important meetings….Many couldn’t attend most important moments of their lives. Who are we supposed to blame? The officers? The pilot? Or the Indian government itself? No one will even nod back at us…..We have to one or the other day suffer all this. Silence is always better than complaining. Coz our lives are in their hands for the whole time we are in the flight. No guarantee and no warranty!


Hoping for the best changes in Air India!


Jai hind!!! 



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